School is almost out. This is the last of my 30 credits that I had to take to get my other AA for the el.ed program. I'm a little frustrated with school all together. I have been trying to do well, and I think I have considering my lack of motivation. I feel like I should be done by now, but instead I am still trying to get into a program--one that starts every 2 years. I am supposed to have a 3.0 with my last 45 credits...I don't know if that will happen because my brain cannot comprehend things in my statistics class. If I don't get that 3.0 and they don't allow me to petition against that, then I don't know what I will do. That's ridiculous too since I already have an AA from BYUI. ugh...frustrated.
Friends--or lack there of. I don't know what it is but I have been feeling lonely lately. I love hanging out with Lane, and his family, Kim and the kids...but I just feel like outside of that I have no close friends. I have emotionally close friends in California and Rexburg, but not really any physically close ones here other than Larsons/Heltons. I have friends at work and church...I'll hang out. But I guess I'm feeling left out because I'm the young one, have no kids and can't relate, etc. Maybe it's just in my head. I am shy, I don't talk much. I get told all the time that I look mean until people get to know me. I'm aware that I don't talk or smile much. I'm not depressed, I've just always been like that. It's something I'd like to get over but I can't. Blah, this is random. I don't know why I'm so emotional right now, just venting.
I don't know what it is about this meal that I love so much, but it's on my top 5 favorite meals. Maybe it's because it reminds me of when my mom used to make it before her and my dad would leave for a date? It's always better when my mom makes it anyway. haha (like I said...random).
Home--I'm ready to go visit home. Maybe all this emotional crap will go away when I get my fill of home. I'm also bringing by brother, Trevor home with me to live here for a few months. I'm pretty excited for that! There's another friend! :) Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with hanging out with Lane/his family...but I guess I'm just used to Rexburg or being home and having friends to just go out with.
Well...don't get the wrong idea about this message (that I'm depressed or pregnant or whatever)...I'm just venting. I'm a girl. I get emotional, that's all! I just need a day at the beach with my family. That would make everything feel better!
PS. This phone sucks. I have talked to multiple people who have it as well and they have the same response. It turns off randomly and constantly!! I need a new one...
6 comments:
The beach makes everything better! I agree with you, I also need a day at the beach with my family. Someday we should have one together :) I am feeling lonely as well just because I am stuck inside all day with the cutest little baby but... he can't talk back to me. haha I know that I feel tons better about my lack of friends situation when I get outside. Anything outside: run, walk, go to the park, have a picnic, sit in the grass, go for a bike ride. If you are like me, getting outside takes my mind off those kinds of things. I am glad you vented and got it all out, that also makes me feel tons better. :)
It's totally understandable. I went through that when we moved to Idaho. I felt like everyone in my ward was older and had kids. I still feel that way sometimes, but am also just in need of some home time. Have fun in Cali :)
Move Move Move!!!!!! to Cali. I love you Jannica. Can't wait to see you.
Washington weather brings it out. We need sunshine. It's been pushing 100+ for weeks here in Texas, but I wouldn't trade it for Washington.
Family provides some of the best friendship, but we do need bff's. Too bad mine live in Utah & WA.
Hang in there, the sun should start shining soon, and that should help some.
i have been here many a time. girls need friends (outside of family sometimes). or at least lots of little trips to compensate
{hugs cousin}.
wishing you luck with the studying too!
i totally DON'T think you're depressed! i know that i definitely have my days where it seems everything just sucks and all i want to do is complain to someone. thankfully not all days are like this--hope this day, today, is going better for you!
p.s. i'm much the same way as you when it comes to people thinking im mean when really im just shy. wouldnt it be nice to be able to change who we are? then again, we wouldnt be us.
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